DEAR MISS MANNERS: How do I politely decline a close relative’s offer to bring an appetizer or side dish to our annual large family gathering? His bringing something requires me to take food out of my oven and adjust the temperature to accommodate his heating instructions. It throws off my timing for the whole meal — for a house full of hungry people — and causes me no end of stress and aggravation. The last time, he arrived late, when my meal was pretty much ready to serve. I had to put off serving for over a half-hour to bake and serve his appetizers — after everyone had been munching on …
