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DEAR AMY: Years ago, my neighbor died suddenly. His wife ran to our door for help after he collapsed, and we took all the appropriate steps. We called 911, tidied up the chaos in the house, and even found a close relative who was camping miles away. It was an honor to do so. When it was obvious the house was filled with family, we dropped off some food for the group to share. What prompts this question is what happened afterwards. Much later, a daughter saw me and apologized profusely for not sending a card of thanks. I was horrified to think my help also became an etiquette burden to anyone. …